Surprise Setup

I’m not sure if it’s just that this is baby #5, or the fact that we’ve chosen to take a very different journey this time around with a home birth midwife, or a combination of both, but the time sure is flying, and it’s still sometimes easy to almost forget we’re expecting – even though the belly is becoming a more obvious reminder, along with the little “flutters” of movement.

At this point in all my other pregnancies, we’d had two ultrasounds already – one around 9 weeks and one around 20 weeks.  Now, here we are at almost 24 weeks and haven’t had one yet.  And I kind of like it that way.

Sure, there’s part of me that wonders if the baby is fine and forming well and such.  But, we’re just trusting that all is well, and that if at any point it’s not, that God will alert us to any problems and sustain us through the journey they bring to our family.

Honestly, the “biggest” (most tangible?) reason we opted to skip the 20 week ultrasound with this baby is because we wanted to choose to be surprised this time around, and I knew I’d need to set myself up for that.  If we had gone in for the 20 week ultrasound, I’m 99% certain I would have caved and said, “Oh, just tell me!”  It’s the “type A” planner in me – it hasn’t been entirely beaten out of me 4 kids later, even though I’m definitely more of a “wing it” person in many ways now.

In some ways, I miss not knowing.  It’s hard not wanting to call the baby “it” but not being able to say “he” or “she” really.  We always enjoyed talking to and praying for the baby by name…

Even though, “they” were wrong with our #3 and we were totally surprised anyway…

Yes, back in 2008, we were told we were expecting a third girl, and then “Lydia” popped out with boy bits and was suddenly Matthew.  It was definitely interesting trying to explain that to our oldest, who was not quite 4 at the time.  She was so confused.  She is now 8 and really wants to know ahead of time if this new baby is a brother or sister, but she seems to understand and be OK with our decision to plan on being surprised this time around.

Overall, I have to say, I think I’m enjoying this intentional surprise setup.  And June will be here before we know it anyway.  🙂